A hope

Today is 6th of June 2017. Its been a week since I've got promotion and the news is that I'll be soon transferred to some branch where I need to complete my rural service. Posting is expected to be for at-least 2 years. At first it seemed to me as if its going to spoil all my plans, but now as I'm more and more accepting the reality to come- I feel as if its the blessing in disguise. Its a golden oppurtunity for me to live a simple lifestyle in a rural village- far away from the crowd. I hope to live and talk to the trees and the animals there. I'd imagine myself standing atop a Himalayan cliff with long trees everywhere and waterfalls in the background. I'd like to listen to the birds chirping and the sounds the breeze makes as it blows past the leaves. I'd love to take deep breathe of the fresh air the world has to offer. I wish to engage myself for the needy and the poor. I want to contribute to the world- I have a lot to offer and I'll never get tired doing it. In fact that is where I always wanted to be.I'd love to live in a peaceful world far away from the crowd- a world where people are so busy making their lives perfect that they forget to live it.I want to make the most of my life by contributing to nature and the needy.

Life in a Metro

Its probably the first time I've started my diary entry from office. Hectic schedule and heavy work makes me ponder something. I'm completing two years in this Metro city Mumbai, known as the home of Bollywood, and the city that never sleeps. But all these credit comes at a heavy price. Ask the people living here, and they'll tell you that they've spend their lifetime rushing through the crowded local trains and fighting the torrential rains.My own experience here was no different- you survive here rather than live! Right from the moment you wake up in the morning you're in rush- rush to catch the train- rush to catch the shared cab- rush at the elevators to reach office in time- rush to finish the daily work only to find that you've been allotted some extra work as well- and again rushing in the evening for the taxi and the train and the metro, eventually to reach home and rush for dinner so that you can get that extra half an hour space for your own well being and mental rejuvenation. And the cycle repeats daily- seven days a week and fifty two weeks a year. Life's so different that it used to be back home. I don't even find time for my favourite hobbies like sports and photography. I could not even update my blog for months nor could I find time to scribble down those spontaneous poems. All these brings into mind a vert simple question- what do I really want in life? Do I want to live a hectic monotonous banker life working for the wage? Or do I want to engage myself in those little things I like most and bring out the best in me. As somebody rightly said: 'Journey is more important that the end', you do what you like the most and you'll definitely be more satisfied in the end. Though I'm doing the monotonous work right now, but my heart says that soon I'll do what I always dreamt and longed for. 

Victory tastes that more sweeter when you have to earn every bit of it.

You forever...

"The Lady of my life  Queen of my dreams  Mate of my soul"

It’s as if the fallen earth gave me rebirth, it was when I quenched the most, when I felt the loneliest, God showed me my true love, someone in whom I see my own reflection, my existence.

For a moment, it felt as if the whole waiting, all the difficulties and resistance I faced was all lessons taught by time and it was worth waiting for. Now I really know the value of a true relationship and the importance to maintain it. I couldn’t have asked any better as if time told me that I deserved more than what I desired. Nimya really is the soul I always searched for.

Right from my childhood days when I started feeling lonely and left odd one out, I’d been searching for the soul mate who shares every feeling like me. Someone who values our relationship more than anything else, someone for whom I would be the highest priority, someone with whom I feel complete and comfortable, someone who shares similar likes and dislikes and passion with me, someone who is peaceful and lives in a dream world like me, someone who’s ready to give everything for love, someone who’s passionate about things we do, someone who’s creative and someone who understand everything I want to say without me uttering a single word.

I feel no surprise that there was something about this lovely lady that made me follow her on Facebook for over a year. The way she carries and presents herself, there’s a charm in every picture. And now that I know my lady much more, I realized that there’s always some hints thrown to you by your destiny and that’s all it was. It felt as if all my childhood prayers were heard and acknowledged. I got exactly the same type of person I always had dreamt for.

She possesses each and every quality that I had wanted. Carefully noursihed and grown around me, but without my knowledge. At times, I get really surprised that we haven’t met or talked with each other in spite of studying 12 years in school together and being in the same house. But that’s where the fun lies; everything happens for a reason, everything happens when the time arrives. As dad said:

“Ache Din Aane Wale Hai”.

2014: The year

The year started off shakily with grandpa’s death and the trend continued all through the year. The year, in which most of the part I lived alone in Mumbai, a year which took so many influential people from my life and a year which taught me how to survive alone. Eventually, it was only after the storm had passed and the calmness restored that I finally found the person of my dreams. Call it destiny or fate, my life totally changed once I met Nimya. It felt as if the whole purpose of the life is served and justified. The year ended on another shaky note with my maternal grandpa expiring. In December, RSKZ™ attended Resh’s wedding in Kerala. I felt totally out of sorts there, it took me a lot of time to settle with the folks. Overall, year 2014 went past quickly and took away many strong and old relations only to bring new relations and trust in life. A year that helped me built as an independent individual and a thinker.

A different path

Its been ages since I've written a post. Two years and three months to be exact. The roller coaster of life has taken me to all  new heights and lengths. Two years back, I wouldn't have even dreamt of working as a banker or living alone in a new city, but life never ceases to amaze and amuse us; and thus I got selected as a Bank Officer in Canara Bank posted in Mumbai. The transition was very fast and even before I could mentally accept my fate, Soo many changes with soo less time to respond or digest.

The Journey of Btech

Over the next few days, I will be opening my mind on my journey of Btech. Unlike the schooldays, where I lived and ruled like a king; my four years of Btech have been a period of learning and toiling. Most of the instances, I kept a low profile. Infact the struggle had started way before the commencement of Btech, right from the days of 12^th boards, and the fact that friends kept leaving one after one. And then I stepped into my college life, it was an all new beginning in life. I remember my mom telling me: ‘Beta its a new morld thid, very different from your school. Its college, its UP, beware of the people, live a simple life, keep a simple profile. Dont get aggressive and don’t get into altercations’. Somehow the words got 100% absorbed.

13^th August 2007 : the day when a new chapter in life opened. The first few days of the college were great. I put my best efforts to make a good friend circle, one like RSKZ. But as each day passed, my attempts kept disappointing me. I was losing grounds even in my studies. It was just a reflection of my state that I got a suppli in my 1^st semester exams. Slowly Btech became a struggle I was under the impression that surviving in itself a big thing here. By the midway 2^nd year, the struggle saw its ugliest low. Nothing seemed to work well for me, and then things start going bad, it feels as if people around you are changing. Same happened with me and I started feeling isolated. Friend group slowly shrunk to just Gaurav, Mohit n me in gang.

3^rd year started a bit better. I started the session trying to think positive and stay happy. Lot worked out my way and atleast I didn’t felt the isolation in my life- Mayank, Gaurav and me became the gang. Sadly Mohit got a year back.

Moser Baer played a big role in my life esp as a ‘shift gear’ of my life. A new life sprung out and I felt like the same happy as I was during my best schooldays. That happy factor followed me into my college life as well. Though there were some bothering in my personal, but college never contributed to any of those headaches. The 4^th year of college was all about enjoying the moments. The gang was again confined to gaurav, mayank Srikant and me. The concept of making a EEE T-shirt made us work as a group. There were lots of struggle and at a point we almost cancelled the plan. But somehow we kept moving ahead. The rolling out of T-shirts in feb 2011 were a great achievement. Few days later, on a placid Valentine’s Day, when I was least expecting it; I got placed in Tech Mahindra. Later, an unexpected Gate exam turned to be an achievement of sorts, and in the end, a simple farewell party for which we had expected an initial estimation of 20-25 poeple, break all our expectations and doubled in count to have 49 classmates! That was infact a big achievement!

Galgotias College of Engg and Tech.

GCET Farewell Day pics

Past Memories: photos of my childhood

Past memories

The letter...

It might seem funny- my month long efforts in bringing you this letter is just for a minute or two's reading for you. But still, let me present you with some collections for your long forgotten days.

The winters are slowly evading and so are my zing for life. I don't enjoy cricket as i used to, mafia wars' is just a waste of time and with my reliance call plan getting terminated, my time in solitude prevails long and loud. and just like 'fashion' which goes and comes back, my interest in writing seems to have bloomed once again in me.

Life's moved a long long way in the last few years. Opportunities have come and gone like the dried leaves getting blown by the winds. the same old question comes again-'What now? Where from here?'. Now that the B.Tech is on its brink, I still ponder what to do- MBA? M. Tech? Government job? IT job? Now that my profession is not earning me a job, lets hope that my passion gets me one.

For years I've been advising people around me to live and think at a higher perspective; not to think life in one dimension; but to think from all possible ways to it. but now, i feel myself confused and unidimensional. Something strange is about to happen...

Importance of moral victory

All throughout my life till date, I’ve always relished in quick and fast achievements. Trying to hurry up things and get things quick. Today, I realise the importance of mental achievement, or what we call as ‘Moral victory’. The process may, however be a bit lengthy and far tougher, but the fruits are also far sweeter. A victory of minds, making even your opposition respecting you is a great moral victory. And if achieved so, it’s one of the sweetest feelings to ever taste in life!

It’s like conquering the highest of all mountains. And even after many years people would still regard you at the top!

The guiding light

Some of the characters around who've inspired me:

Sindhu Aunty: the lamp that enlightened me

Jilsen: the guy who travelled with me all throughout my school life

Denny Mash: an inspiration for mimics, music, parody etd

Shobhana teacher: the fear factor

Arvind: the one who turned me overnight

Sudheesh: Watch Out!!!

Vineet: the henchman

Pooja: soulmate; a revolution in my life

Pradeep mash: mixing caution with aggression

Vasudevan Sir: never underestimate life and time

Nygil: a true mallu by virtues; taught me the virtue of simplicity in life

Srikant: the time factor and simple fundas for success

Nikhil Negi: an inspiration for peotry and prose; he's the architect behind the modern Jishnu

My Merry Dawn

Will my merry dawn dusk into darkness?Will my dawn disappear in the tides of time? Or will she awaken me throughout my life with its magnanimous rays scattering in all directions, purifying my soul and fulfilling the purpose for my birth.

"Hope for the best,

Prepare for the worst"

-Manoj Srivastav Sir(my 11th class physics tutor

Is 'victory' the final word?

Is 'victory' the final word? No certainly not! Victory is just a benchmark, a milestone which tells you how well you have performed so far and what more you can do to achieve the perfection. As the great scientist Dr. APJ Abdul Kalam had famously quoted, "Success is a continuous process", and the process continuous rite till your last breathe. More than the joy of achievement, it should be the hunger for further improvement that should drive your ambition. Its the hunger and the determination that decides your destiny, your final word!

True victory is the one which you achieve with your own skill and determination and not what you get at the cost of others'. Biggest victory is happiness, peace and freedom. Even a loss turns into victory if you've lost for the sake of others' good.

Is my Life teasing me?

Is my life teasing me, trying to think about my past, with struggles of my present and thinking about the probabilities of the future? Am I getting confused over what to do and what not to?

No problem, dont get rolled over .Just follow these simple steps and see how life goes simply as one, two, three...

• Stop writing diaries. Its not meant for a guy like me
  
• Don't think about your personality, thats the way i used to when I was a child
• Damn your gloomy past, forget it, even forget some people if necessary
• Dont long for a lost people and relations. Its just a waste of time
• THink positive , thing about 'now'!
• Think about yourself first, others come second
• Enjoy your life.At last there's one 1 life to live
• Khao piyo ash karo(as Arvind says it)